Emotions

Life can be a funny thing.  The mood you are in can change very quickly.  I have mood swings.  I am a woman.  I don't think they are that bad, but I guess maybe they are.  I remember once being told by a guy that I can get medicine to help me control my emotions (one day he wanted to marry me and the next he wouldn't even talk to me so I thought my emotions were very rational, but I guess not.)  This whole week I have been very happy, more happy than I have been for a long time.  Today has been weird.

I don't know if it is the moon or the rain, but I have been up and down all day.  All morning while I was teaching I was so happy.  I left the school, still happy.  Somewhere between the junior high and my house my spirits sank.  I started thinking about how you can feel so important to someone and then all of a sudden they are moving on in their life without you and they are doing just fine.  Don't ask me where this thought process came from because I honestly couldn't tell you.

Sitting at my house was not helping so I went to see my mom at her school.  Walking into the elementary was like a catalyst to my happy emotions.  My mom's students are just so excited to be at school and it just rubs off onto you.

You know those texting conversations you have where you feel like you have something important to say to someone but they obviously would rather do anything but text you; you can just really tell.  That happened.  Sitting in my mom's kindergarten room.  It is silly, but it was painful.

I came home feeling broken, like I couldn't even begin to control the emotions I was feeling.  Emotions that really had no logical source.  I went for a walk with my mom.  It helped but not a lot.  So I did what every girl does when they are in this type of mood.  I watched a chick-flick.  I was smart and picked The Vow.  I cried from the very beginning before anything even happens all the way to the end (the twistedly happy ending) and now I sit here.  Controlling my emotions with my trusty Book of Mormon by my side.  I am excited to see what lesson Heavenly Father wants me to learn tonight.  Maybe it will explain this weird day.