Destined for the "Under-Arm" Hug Forever

My friends are weird.  We talk about weird things.  A recent topic of conversation was the way we hug.  This conversation gave a lot of insight to my life.  I am meant to be an Under-Arm Hugger.  What is an under-arm hug you ask?  Let me explain.

The girl puts her arms around the guy under his arms, around his chest.  The opposite of this hug is the Around the Neck Hug.  This is the hug where the girl puts her arms around the guys neck.  This hug is more intimate.  This is the "I'm interested in you" hug.  Under the arms is a pure "you're a good friend" hug.  This is a hug I have gotten many many times.  Sadly, this is the hug I got in past relationships too.

I'm short, this is a fact, but not so short I can't reach.  I'm realizing now that this is my destiny.

My hugs also usually consist of their arms around my shoulders or my head.  Squeezing hard, probably hoping I will pop.  I think it is time to swear off hugs.  From now on I am a hand-shaker.  Except for my family.  They can have hugs.

Under-Arm Hugger